My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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