at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize