Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
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