the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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