last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
