Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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