her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
I love having hate sex.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
