I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
You are a booty call, not a friend.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
