Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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