did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
Randomize
