there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
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