seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
