After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
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That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
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