After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
Randomize
