yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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