I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Both the cop and the paramedic were hitting on me while I was on the ambulance. My boob fell out and they just about had full on erections right there. They Came back two hours later to sign my cast with their phone numbers. #stillhotwhilebleeding
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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