uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
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