I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
Randomize
