that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
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