Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Randomize
