You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
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