can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
my poor anus
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
