Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(614): View more from Ohio

I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.

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(862): View more from New Jersey

Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.

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(718): View more from New York

no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.

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(647): View more from Ontario

Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.

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(562): View more from California

If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up

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(559): View more from California

Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?

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(301): View more from Maryland

He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.

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(925): View more from California

It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.

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(702): View more from Nevada

She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?

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