i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Randomize
