her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Randomize
