Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
