ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
