It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
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