Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
Go christen that room with your naked body.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
Randomize
