If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Randomize
