you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
I just gift wrapped bread.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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