did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
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She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
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Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
Why can't burritos get me drunk
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
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