What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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