To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
Randomize
