these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
