dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
Randomize
