It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize
