no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Randomize
