He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
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