I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize