he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
Fuck appropriateness.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
