i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
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