just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
Randomize
