I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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