You just made me feel so damn special
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
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