Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
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It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
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You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
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