Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
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