not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
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