I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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