the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Shame is for Republicans.
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