I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
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