I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
ugly people sure do ruin things
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
Randomize
